MY reality

I grew up in a household of 3 generations of female.. 1 woman each.

So where are the men?

My grandfather is living with his second wife.

My father is living with his second wife.

I am off course not yet married.

My first boyfriend( who trophied my first kiss): kissed another girl when he was still tryin to get me into bed.

My second boyfriend: courted me to win a bet of 12 packs of cigerretts.

My third boyfriend: Flirted sexually with another girl on ICQ. Insists on boys night out so that he can approach other girls. Gave me infection and still insisted that he didnt sleep with someone else.

Had a friend's bf askin me if I wanna be his 2nd girlfriend.

Had another guy who slept with me while he was havin a girlfriend.

And I'm still encountering guys who wants to cheat on their girlfriends.

Tell me how am I supposed to have faith that boyfriends or husbands will not cheat on me?

How am I suppossed to trust?

This is the kind of reality I live in.

So weak….

There was a time where I knew what I wanted… and I worked hard fer it.

There was a time where I loved pain… knowin in full faith that it will bring me where I wanted to go.

There was a time where I knew nothin could bring me down.

I was strong.

Relationships failed… I fell and I got up .. fast

Sacrifices made just for the grades.. but it felt great

Physical pain was momentary and and gives a special kind of high.

Friends looked up to me.. sayin that I was "always changin, always moulding myself to be a better person"

Now I'm just a useless weakling.

I cant protect myself from hurt. I'm so vulnerable.

I fall and I stay down.. I stay down and rot..

Failure has become me… I have become failure.

I feel like there is nothin that I can achieve.

I'm a weakling. I hate it. I hate every moment of it.

Dwelling in failure for 5 years. It has become a way of life. A kind of life where I just lie on my bed.. lookin at the beautiful skies and trees…. beware.. for nature fools u sometimes..

I'm in no position to give anybody advice.. I'm so weak.

I'm so scared…. I'm so afraid of the pain that I need to go through…. but i need to breakthrough to spread my wings..  

I want to be weak no more.

And I shall rise in full splendour once again.

Traffic Signs

This is ingenious.. enjoy

 

Push-Up: Turn-on or Fako?

Walkin around with my twin peaks held up high and proud in push up bras can be really distracting.

Not just the irrisistable urge to sneak a peak at them at any chance I an get away with, or innocently touchin them just to get a feel of the softness and the fullness of my favourite female body part.

But all the attention from males and females alike, can really start turning me on. That's not good .. when u are out in the streets.. u know..

Truth is I love breasts.. well u know what they say, the bigger the better… lol..

So inevitably girls turn to bras padded so thick, I think if u ever threw darts at them, at the chest area, they will be so well protected they could be walkin around without knowin that darts are stickin out of their boobs.

Well I must admit… Push-Up bras are great fashion invention. They help you fill out those low necklines nicely… make your top look fantastic, whichever way you see it. (puns intended)

However, I have never been a really great fan of push up bras. Reason being that I feel like a fako.. faking the real size of my assets. The bigger reason is I don't want a guy to pick me up cuz of the size just to be disappointed after i drop everythin. That would be so embarressing!

So I've been asked by my ex-boyfriend… in one of those conversations.. "What's wrong with wearin Push Up Bras?"

It seems according to him, the bra does its work(very well) to the point the he takes it off her… from then on.. it dosent really matter if the bra was padded of not.

So I'm really curious. Are we turnin you guys on wearin Push Up Bras or are we fakos?

Purple Corset

Purple Corset 

Royal Mysterious Sexy Liberating

Gothic Restrictive Alluring Sinful

Errotic Dark Sensual Supportive

Servitude Tight Strong Gentle

Submissive Withdrawn Tempting Exploding

Moody Demure Seductive Delicate

Explosive Elusive Powerful Shy

Dominating Beautiful Proud Teasing

Charming Elegant Poised Controlled

Disclaimer: Picture is part of  symbolism.. and shd under no circumstances be assumed to be me.